Saturday, January 09, 2010

Truck Driver

It was one of those fortunate day when we had got an outing from hostel after almost a month. I guess wardie was in a good mood for whatever reasons. All of us waited for this day and everyone left the hostel at the specified time. The outing was for 2 hrs and we wanted to enjoy every minute of our freedom. 3 of us (Enchantica, T.Dolphin and third roomy) decided to be together and visit our most happening place, sector 14 market. As usual we tried avoiding the rickshaw and started walking towards the destination.

(Rickshaw used to cost us 10 bucks, which meant 15 long minutes in a cyber cafe. For every penny that we had, we used to equate with how many minutes it fetches in an internet parlor. Those days internet parlors charged 30 Rs an hr {it started with Rs60/ per minute of horrible speed})


On a sunny afternoon the distance actually felt like a never ending one. We had our own landmarks like rickshaw point, chintpurni mandir, shortcut point to hostel etc, which helped us keep a track on how much we still need to drag ourselves. We 3 were casually chitchatting and striding on the road, when we heard noise of a truck coming from far. As we knew it was a city of rash drivers, we immediately stepped on the footpath which was to our left hand side. The noise of the truck approached but we continued ignoring and walking. As the truck approached us, a hand came out of its window towards us and the ugly looking driver said loudly "Andar aa ja". As he did that act, the girl at left hand side got scared, lost her balance due to the fear of getting kidnapped and threw herself on the others, making all hit a largely urinated wall towards the right hand side. We were piled up on each other as if the municipality truck had just come to the city and dumped its garbage lot. The truck had sped away after the act.

The three of us sat on the footpath for a minute of shock. Suddenly first girl stood up, dusting her clothes and said: lets get up fast before he decides not to accept his defeat by not getting one of us. (As if she had played like a jhansi ki raani in saving all of us, and trucker driver would have taken this defeat on his ego)

Second one (who was still trying to come out of what happened) said " he missed the collars".

First one: What do u mean by that?

Second one: if we would have been in one of those collar dresses, it would have been easy for him to grab.

First one: yeah, god saved us, else imagine we being grabbed by our collars, and pulled in from the window of the truck inside.

Third one (whose heart was pumping like a drum in parade) starts laughing and said: i would have been the safest one.

The other two not realizing the context of her being safe as compared to other two ask her in chorus - "how?"

The third one says : Imagine, if he would have flicked you two, it would have been easy like pulling a feather in, but when he would have tried me, i would have slipped half way through the window and then my bums would have gone stuck considering their size. He wouldnt have preferred driving a girl half inside the window and half flying in the air outside while kidnapping them.

The two of them who were scared of the driver coming back to pick them again, broke into laughter as they had build their imaginations.

Driver never came back looking for us and we were safe but we had learnt a lesson that it was safe to walk next to urinated walls then to give a truck driver his share of laugh on his adventure.


Friday, December 25, 2009

lovely Balloons

One thing that can make a girl conscious is her size of B@@bs. Some girls are really heavy and some are flat there. Even if others don't make fun of them they still would be haunted with the feeling on either side...

We too had a a girl called Lovely..she is the one who has been mentioned on malai maar ke post...She was kinda flat and conscious and yet blunt about the same. There are very few people in life who can laugh on themselves and she was truly one among them. At 10.00 p.m when we were all locked behind those grills as per normal hostel routines, she came to 2nd floor corridor and stood opposite to our door passing some nasty comments on one of the juniors. She had two balloons which she grabbed from someone. She entered our room and had a question mark on why were we not doing something...we were all sitting and thinking our own stuff. She hated boredom and non gossip environment.

She started entertaining us with her bf stories which weren't that exciting..then with a gloomy face she said her bf doesn't like one thing about her..while we were engrossed in our own thoughts and pretended we listened to her, this statement definitely caught our attention...(well girls are little careful on what any bf on this earth says and tries to match/sync up accordingly)

With a pause she said: well he feels that my b@@bs are pretty small and they should have been big. As she finished, she saw 4 set of eyes staring at her b@@bs (another interesting thing a girl would do is, after staring at others she will finally look at her owns)...she got more cheesed off and said " i don't know if those big would suit me"...

One of us said "why don't u try and see what size would suit and may b then we can think of a solution". Her eyes twinkled with the thought of big ones...Suddenly she left the room in a hurry...we were confused but it was expected...(sometimes some girls do weird things at weird times with weird reactions..)

5 mins later there was a knock at our door, the room wasn't locked from inside and hence none of us got up to see who really it was with those etiquette after all those insulting ragging sessions.
Then someone hits the door with a leg and it bangs to the wall dusting some of its whitewash...

All 4 set of eyes were on the door to greet the great personality who is yet to enter! There comes Ms.Lovely looking a bit different...i would say a bit more appealing (atleast to guys!)...she hadnt put any make up on her nor had she changed her dress...its just that she looked like Jenna Jameson in that black full covered top of hers...4 of us were wondering on what lies beneath..

with all curious expressions on our face we asked her -> whats that??? And she just lifted her Tshirt for answers...2 balloons fell and we went mad laughing...rolling on our beds...she made an innocent face and asked us on why we were behaving like mads...we just could not speak and had our laughing fits...

She stood and waited for 5 mins but all of us were in tears, tears with laughter...had no energy in getting up from where we had fallen and had no energy to explain how dummy b@@bs can fall so freely with gravity :D...we were just hoping that she doesn't try that stunt with her bf...we were on our wagon of wild imaginations on what -if scenarios...

She got irritated when we did not appreciate her idea and made fun of her...she ran behind those balloons in the room, picked and tried placing them back...then covered with her black top and went out for some frank opinions...as she stepped out she met 2 other girls and she left them in the same hysterical state in the corridor...she was trying to find one single soul who would say its looking good...

While she was looking for her prey like a vampire in the night, she encounters our irritating Assistie, who had come for her attendance schedule. With those huge, artificial, separable assets she faced the assistee. Assistee was speechless and under a state of shock for a minute, there was an awkward silence for a minute or two. Lovely tried breaking it by starting a conversation but assistee was not able to take her eyes off lovely's chest...lovely tried her best to indulge her in the conversation (eye to eye) but she just wouldn't look at any other direction...

Assistee could not control her curiosity and asked her these golden words: "how did u grow them in 3 hrs, i saw u in the prayer and it was all normal, why are they swollen?" we don't know what lovely felt at that particular moment...

There was no end to our hysterical laughs...i don't remember what wee hour we slept but assistee's last sentence kept running like a marquee in our minds...

Basic Instinct

Day1:

We realized that not many seniors were interested in ragging us (read raping us). They seemed to busy with something which as a new joiner was difficult to understand or predict. All we could see was that they were jammed in a room and still there was pin drop silence. Can u believe that more than 50 girls in a room and still silence.

That reminds me of a joke:
A group of tourists visit the Niagara Falls and are accompanied by a guide. The guide says "I welcome you all to the Niagara Falls. These are the world's largest waterfalls and the sound intensity of the waterfall is so high that the sound of even 20 supersonic planes passing by can't be heard!" "Now, may I request that the ladies in the back keep quiet so that we can hear the falls!"

That was superlative degree (In 10th grade it was referred in hindi as "Atishyokti Alankar")

Now coming back to main episode:

All of them came out after sometime and they were in weird moods...some were giggling, some were disgusted..some were excited and some were....sorry i cant explain this.

Few days later we came to know that 50 girls can be silent only if they are watching a porn movie for the first time in their life...strange...now i m sure u would ask which one..well someone in that small town could manage to only get "KamaSutra (KS)" for rent!

We all juniors were equally desperate to watch one...Few months later, after the ragging session was over and we patched up with seniors, we showed our inclination and interest to them. They laughed and agreed on their second and our first adventure. We go permission to watch movie in a hall. 3-4 girls went out to buy a movie and they came back with Baby's day out! Well that was what we had told our warden on what we are watching but the original movie that they had got was "Basic Instinct". I dont know whose idea it was of calling it a porn movie!!! Girls actually have a different source of information on reviews and the link below explains how it works:

Bf -> Gf: Basic instinct is a good movie..we liked the scenes ;)
Gf -> to her best friend in hostel: my bf said its a sexy movie and we shld watch ;)
Best friend -> to a casual friend: lets watch BI as i have heard its a movie on sex
Casual friend -> to all girls in hostel one by one: lets watch basic instinct and its a porn...

We all decided to have lunch and start the movie at 3.00 in the afternoon so that there are least disturbances and visitors will also be less to hostel.

2.45 p.m: few girls having butterflies in stomach, few nervous, few psyched out..and few very very excited...

2.50 p.m: 90% have reached the hall room and waiting the movie to be played

2.55 p.m: 100% girls have reached the room and one girl struggling with VCR and the cassette of basic instinct.

3.00 p.m: the movie starts and the girls silent and engrossed in the movie.

3.15 p.m: knock on the door (btw we had bolted it from inside due to wardies fear)

3.15.10 p.m: girl struggling to close the basic instinct and putting the baby's day out's cassette.

3.15.15 p.m: the knocks are high and we can hear wardie screaming to open the door

3.16 p.m: wardie has taken a seat in the middle to watch the movie... (do i need to specify that she had guessed that there was something fishy in the room and that's y it took long for girls 2 open the room)

5.30 p.m: we finish baby's day out with a sad face..

5.31 p.m: she asks us to go and return the cassette to the shop..@%@!#%#$&*%^#$^

5.32 p.m: girls return to their rooms

Well it very painful to let the CD go...full KLPD...

we too learnt all the lingo's from boys hostel and u know how we got them :D

The movie club never happened in hostel again due to the fear of wardie..she remained our wardie for next 3 years...

Signing off with beautiful memories...


Note: BTW i watched Basic instinct when i did my PG from a diff place and ensured that the room full of girls was not a suspect...we had got 3 other movies to ensure wardie is not awake whole nite :P...

Tuesday, March 03, 2009

Special Tea: Malai maar ke..

Once upon a time there was a lady who was appointed as Assistant Warden for the great hostel. Her prime responsibility was to ensure that girls were taken care in the hostel and they do not get an opportunity to sneak away (with or without a guy was not a point then). This lady was in her late forties with grey & black hair which were never colored. She seemed to be too much into godly stuff (by that we mean praying etc)… and had a peculiar way of greeting people. She used to ask – “ theek ho, theek ho” whenever u see or greet her. Theek ho was twins for her… by which we mean she never uttered single theek ho! So sometimes we used to ridicule her as theeko aunty. We also had our set of clowns who used to go and ask her “theek ho..theek ho aunty?”

She joined when it was ragging time for us. We were counting on her as to be a rescue agent who will free us from the inhuman treatment of our seniors. We wanted her to know that we were being ragged in a college where officially ragging was ban. None of us could open up to her and tell her the truth as she was new in the system and her credibility or what you can call as reliability was not known to any of us. We were also holding back thinking what if she turns out to be a relative or a known aunt of a senior and reveals the complete thing to them? The possibility of such a deadly scenario’s outcome was way beyond our imaginations! Senior would not only rag but will rip us apart if they come to know that we opened our mouth.

The only hope of getting relieved from such a treatment was to get it noticed without being caught. As always seniors had called us at a ghastly hour to rag. They assumed that Assistant Warden had slept at ground floor in her room and it was safe. We had planned in a different manner. 2 of us had gone to ask for medicines which were in assistant warden’s custody. (Why medicines in Custody – “Guess the hostel management feared that girls might not like the food in hostel and depend on tablets as a supplement to food for they were free of cost).

She asked which one and they randomly picked a name as though there was something fishy. She gave the medicine and sensed it. We were 100% sure that she smelled the thing and would come in the direction just like a dog comes chasing from a piece of meat. While we were getting ragged, she appeared from no where and just saw all of us sitting on ground floor and she saw all seniors on the chairs/Bed. She asked seniors “What’s happening?” and they answered that just a get together and pretended it to be a birthday party of one of them. How instant their excuse was. Wardie assumed it to be true and joined them in their false merriment. She felt sleepy and excused herself. As she left, we all felt like idiots. We realized how dumb she was to not figure out a ragging session. We had to convince ourselves that she had done her graduation some 30 yrs ago and then ragging was not a word which was this popular. This buzz was to create panic for destitute like us.

The ragging saga continued and scapegoats (we) were slaughtered everyday. We just returned from college one afternoon and saw 2 cute looking - fat girls sitting there. (I always argue with my friends that fat people can also look cute & when they don’t agree, I tell them look at me and the instant agreement comes). They were of our age. We thought 2 new bakra’s of the season and we smiling within. Our happiness eloped when Wardie told us that those were her daughters and had to come to stay for a day to experience hostel life. (Yes, why not after all it was 8th wonder of this world to see and experience!)

Anyways, we had nothing but to accept the uninvited guests. Those two moron were put with us to experience the hostel life…We had to tell them everything on how we do things…how we crave for homemade food, how we miss families...how badly we miss friends (shhhhh….not to be confused with boyfriends) etc etc. After giving download, we presumed that it was an end of the whole “feel-like-zoo-animal” experience (but assumption & presumptions are mere imaginations and just a feel good factor thing). The frightful experience was awaited and we presented ourselves on senior’s floor at the ghostly hour. As they were about to address, we saw Wardie & gang of two fatso daughters. We thought it’s a coffee break but they came and made themselves comfortable on chairs which were empty there. Seniors continued as if it was a normal session and we had 3 mute spectators there who were enlightening themselves with our oscar winning performances. We pitied ourselves and gave the best performances. As we thought we had done enough of entertainment to our esteemed guests and respectable seniors, the last in the series was the “Guest's Demands”. Now unbelievably those B***** had request for a Mujra performance. Saying no was never an option. (We could relate ourselves to hema malini of Sholay, who says nahinmnnnn….main naachoongi…jab tak hai jaan….). After our customer felt delighted, we were sent back and another chapter of humiliation book was completed. It was then, we could relate to the episode of Wardie turning on her first night of round and leaving us without rescuing coz she was all determined to show her daughters what is called as an “adventure”.

Ragging was over and we became good friends with seniors. There was a lady called Lovely who was really lovely :) She was a sort, who wud do anything for friendship. She was thin girl with wheatish complexion & a blunt cut. Wardie slowly turned into a leech (leech: an animal which stick to human and leaves after sucking all the blood). She used to irritate by engaging in long meaningless, mirthless conversations. It was becoming intolerable for all…including seniors. (Putting a plastic smile and responding to twin theek ho was not easy...Mind You!)

One fine afternoon, we were assembled at lovely’s room and we were casually chit chatting. The grand entry of Lady Wardie happened and the fun turned into a nightmare. She started addressing the assemblage and lovely lovely got pipped and found a way. She excused herself by going for a cup of tea. We were never told those many stories by our grandparents. Those god stories were good for our database but the overdose acted like a horror film and our faced had turned white as a consequence... She banged the door with her leg & could spot her frozen friends. We saw that she was holding a cup of tea. Like a decent (superlative degree) girl, she offered the cup of tea to aunty of all the people. We felt like throwing the same hot tea on her face and ruining her face for pleasing aunty for no rhyme or reason. Aunty sipped the tea and lovely kept observing her face.

She broke the silence by asking Wardie “ hows the chai aunty”.

Aunty replied “ very tasty”
Lovely –“ I made it specially for you”
Aunty –“ How”
Lovely – Actually I went in the mess and made it myself. It’s a special chai..malai maar ke (added cream) …cant u figure out
Aunty – yes..yes..its wonderful!

Aunty left and lovely fell on her bed…much relaxed. We “the frozens” were confused with lovely’s gesture towards aunt and we were speechless. “Wud she do *** licking of such people?” was all that crossed our minds.

Lovely said - “ Comeon guys, relaxed!”

“How could you do it? You know what state we were in lovely! Your gesture will welcome her further to our rooms…as it is we don’t study but after being cooped here...gossiping is the only medium to refresh ourselves and gossiping doesn’t mean talking about gods!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” One of the girl shouted on her.

Lovely tried to calm us down but invain. She shouted back on us and we all were mum for a minute. Then she explained “You guys think I was pleasing her? Are you guys nuts? ...i haven’t done a single act of humanity in my entire life and I wouldn’t start from her atleast! I went to get tea for myself, as my head was spinning!…but then a trick flashed to me. I took the tea and while coming down I had spit in it. I came and gave the same tea to her to vent my frustration and told her that it was exclusive for her coz it was malai maar ke”.

We did not know how to react on it...it was disgustingly funny for us. She made our day and we promised ourselves that whenever we are irritated and can’t see any mercy, we will vent out frustrations by giving malai maar ke chai. That became the special chai of the hostel. That was the day people took the last tea from each other. Every girl preferred getting her tea in her own mug in front of her ;)

Monday, March 02, 2009

Internet and Eggs

Well...when living in an all girls domain, you sure are bound to face certain restrictions on interacting with outside world. We, like any other hostel inmates, also faced the same. Regardless, we knew how to make things work for us..:D




In our hostel, there was a norm, a protocol for outings (outing = going out of hostel for 3-4 hours MAX). We were allowed an official outing of 3 hours every week. This continued to happen until some girls did some nasty things and were caught hanging out with their boyfriends. Stupid Morons!! Guess they didn't hear of little something called as ' Play Safe'. Anyhow, we used to go out every week for these many hours and were happy in our petty lives. The, all of a sudden someone had an idea some day of watching a movie. Unfortunately, the monthly outing had just gone by and we had no option other than to wait till next week. But BAM!! some one's brain got enlightened with a halo and a circle of enlightenment and we had an idea. 'What if we cook a fake story about some tutions in Sec 14. Wardie won't say no. She can't stop us from studying. That's what we are here for!' . After some amendments here and there, we were able to come up with a fool proof plan and we approached wardie very next day first thing in the morning. As expected, she signed the outing slips. This used to be another 'will-she-won't-she' moment for all of us. Whenever we were up for some mischief which required us to travel out of college campus, we had to send out outing slips to Wardie so that she signs it and we have the pass. The time between us filling the slips and it coming back signed, used to be horrible. What if she calls our parents? What if she sends Bassruddin after us? What if this..What if that... Actually we knew that our Warden has nothing more exciting in her life than to keep a check on us. That's why we used to be so skeptical.




And hence started the tradition of 'Tutions' for outings. We started using our tution excuse for every damn thing, shopping, movies, dates[;)] etc etc. It was fun. You know the feeling when you are free and not free at the same time. Im not sure if you know, but it was that kind of feeling. We roped everyone possible into this. Our day Skii friend C, S's cousin, the internet cafe female..everyone was kept in sync that we come to their shop etc for tutions. And instead, we used to roam around, eat golgappas, shop, create unnecessary scenes, enjoy the attention everyone around used to give us. It was fun. Real Fun. When we din't know what we were doing and why we were doing what we were doing. Innocence, immaturity..I don't know. But whatever it was, it gave us those moments of fun which we remember and laugh at, till date.




One more thing associated with these tutions was 'Eggs'. Now we as deprived and starved hostelers, used to eat anywhere..and anything..literally!!. Road side vendors, chatts, fried stuff, no matter how dirty the vicinity is, eggs, paan...anything and everything was welcome.




One of those days, we as usual were standing on thela ( road side cart) of eggs and were enjoying the delicious eggs being served hot by the guy. We finished our business and stopped making noise and left after our tummies were full. I can't believe we used to eat 3-4 eggs at once. I mean, how starved were we.??..Anyhow, next day we went to college and a day scholar came to us. The conversations went like:








Day Ski(DS): Yaar my father saw u guys standing at that thela yesterday eating eggs.




We: Ya..the eggs over there are awesome..u too try them..




DS: No No...u din't get me..Its not good, you people shud not do this.'




We: .Not Do What? Eat..? We shud not eat? If thats what u mean?




DS: No...its not good for girls to stand at roadside vendors selling eggs. BAD girls do it. those who don't belong to good families.




We: Ha haha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha h!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!....whats she saying man...what does families have to do with us eating eggs.?? Listen Babe..we eat 3 egges per head everyday. You promise you will bring us the same everyday and we promise we won't eat there anymore. But..i assure you...our families won't mind us eating anywhere as long as we are onay with that. So..do u agree to bring us these many eggs daily?




DS: .....................................................................i don't know what to say.....................................




We: Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha...bye!!! if you want..you can join us today..we'll be at that thela aroung 4 ish..c ya..and don't forget to bring ur dad...Let him see what a sad little life he is making you to spend...:D...ha ha ha ha ha....








And we continued eating eggs at that thela and at least my parents never objected even after i told them this story. Besides eggs, we also stareted eating paan, chicken soup, dosa etc at such roadside vendors.








Does anyone have a problem with that???:D:D:D

Sunday, March 12, 2006

What do girls talk abt: Episode 2

Now an example of what girls talk about in free time. Cheap wouldnt be a wrong word i guess.

(group conversation)

A: Heyy do u know Miss X in BBA, that day scholar yaar?
B: she, that sick looking female with those dirk circles
C: Oh yes, heard she isnt good in studies but has got a boyfriend
B: someone told me that her boyfriend looks yuck...

A: Ok guys, now did anyone noticed her lips?
B: Yes, those rough ones, she needs a lip guard badly!!!
C: when is her b'day, we will gift a big vaseline!!

A: ok, now i wanted to share a secret (which no longer remains a secret)...guess what???
B: whats that now..dont be a bitch..tell us fast...i m dying to listen
C: she wont tell us so easily...ok what in exchange?

A: nothing in exchange idiot...she smootched her BF and she said it was Heaven
B: (munching her burger) So whats so special? So many girls smootch their bfs and we are only fools on this earth
C: (staring on B's burger and expecting her to leave the last bite) Well she is right whats so special abt smootching?

A: u gals are silly. That cracked-lips-female got a smootch and we hot babes with super soft maintained lips in winters are just observing others. Its a shame!!!
B: yeah it is! but cant smootch each other naa...otherwise we wud have got a tag of LES..
(passing the remaining burger to C and getting into a serious mode)

( C starts lauging hysterically and others look at her with a question mark at their face)

C: dont look at me like that!! i was just thinking something...

A.B: WHATS THAT?

C: Was wondering how her BF wud have reacted after smootch???? U never know if her lips would have peeled off in his mouth!!!!

A.B: YUCK!!!!!!!!!!!

Thats how all our discussions ended in.
"Always in wild imaginations"

Saturday, March 11, 2006

What do girls talk abt: Episode 1

Girls sitting on a corner table of canteen and thinking about the innovative ideas of bunking classes just to sleep for some more time in hostel. Discussion is happening between four gals A,B,C and D. (keeping identity secrets as 1 is married, 2 half-married and one going to hunt pretty soon. so such such things can create probs if hubbies finds out the "cheap" stuffs)


A: Hey, Lets stop thinking on this and attend classes otherwise, lecturer will come searching us in our bed and quilt also. Thanks to B (who happened to be cousin of a strict Lecturer)
B: Oh plssss!!! its not my fault. She doesnt come as a sister. She comes as a faculty ok!!
C: Stop fighting guyss and lets think of somthing fast.
D: I guess, We should attend classes as my attendance is short and peon will not do the attendace fraud this time. He was angry last time as well...

(A and B Looking at the other girls in the canteen and their mind running like a speedometer for ideas)
(C and D breaking their heads with usual and traditional methods of bunking)

B: Heyy See that female standing at the counter and ordering for tea. See her _____
A: Huge...my my how does she manage?

C and D: (in chorous) where?? (looking towards the direction)

A: Abey that female in white transparent salwaar kameez (pointing in her direction)
B: white-Xtra-transparent (correcting her)
C: shit!! how can their parents allow them like this?? my brother wud have surely taunted had i been at my place.
D: Well i guess thats king size and guys prefer that. Do u know??


A: Yes i know, but those are not well shaped. They would not attract guys as per me...
B: how can u say that? i feel thats why she has dressed up this way
D: surely riksaw wala wud have got attracted. Bad seducing stut. She needs training...
C: I am jealous of her to be frank. I am feeling complex looking at hers
A: Yeas, Neighbours envy, Owners pride. Typical Onida Ishtyle


B: heyy lets go, otherwise i will get nice sisterly lines in front of class. Your innovative ideas have already done wonders. lets pack and run.

Wednesday, December 14, 2005

Chicken Soup

You can bet upon girls being born miser. They have plenty to spend on the expensive brand of cosmetics but when it comes on s spending or lending others, they have a pet dialogue " I am broke, u see"
Thankfully we never had those many outings to use these kinda dialogues but cost cutting was always our motive, Coz internet parlours were charging too high for mere surfing. Cost cutting did include cutting on food from big restaurants and we became vegetarians..diet concious u see...(read diet as price)

One fine day, our eyes caught a dhaba in the main market which remained unnoticed for 365 days. We in-decent girls looking at the painted rate card on the wall planned to checkout the stuff...Non veg was out of question but u still look at items u dont wish to eat just to increase your GK (or RK: Rate Knowledge)
we all were startled when we saw this "Chicken Hot and Sour @ 7 Rs". Our eyes twinkled with the prospect of having a chicken within budget and that too in a Veg college...veg hostel and veg mess...We ordered 3 soups and got them parcelled. One of us "Pooja" as the name suggest was a pure vegetarian and gave weird looks when saw us taking those parcels..(Hostel secret 1: she hid her bowl just to avoid the smell and avoid cleaning it..which none of us liked in winters until fungus and bad smell filled our rooms and corridors)

But attimes small things do motivate and soup was a big motivating factor and we did wash our long pending dirty utensils with ice cold water of winters. Hurried to room like a drooling dog for savoring the super HOt soup. Poured the soup in one bowl (to avoid cleaning 3 utensils next time) and were relishing that sombody knocked the door. (Hostel secret 2: We were in the habbit of eating good food with the rooms bolt)...seniors (also called as mangta party by us) were always in 24/7 enquiring for snacks or anything eatable and unfortunately most of them were non vegetarians. We opened the door after keeping the bowl down the bed with our dust platted sandals which i guess any decent person wud not have guessed on this earth. After few minutes we had to take out the soup, keeping the indian tradition in mind "Athithi devo bhava" ;)

We all were eating in the same bowl that in the meantime one of seniors asked the name of the restaurant. We three started looking at each other thinking that if we tell that we got it from a dhaba they will surely kill us..so we happily told the name of the best restaurant in the town.(Hostel secret 3: u can eat shit from the best restaurant in town and ppl will praise u and if u eat good stuff from a small joint..ppl will kill u virtually with their taunts and comments) We had not finshed half the quantity that someone from us uttered " 7 for a bowl isnt bad".That was it. All the faces tuned to us and they all had what-did-u-say looks. They kept the vessel on our study table (Hostel Secret 4: Study tables were used for all puposes but for study) and waited for a while..i guess were trying to recover from a shock. The next sentence from them was " bloody 7 bucks doesnt fetch u mineral water and u got hot and sour" could not answer that and were standing still looking at each other's faces. They instructed us in a harsh voice to 'throw the rotton stuff'....with a heavy heart we carried the bowl and went to washbasin...or wash-face-in during winters ;) and started cursing them.

All this while the soup was heaven and and 7 bucks made it hell. How can people be so diplomat? We sat on the bed quitely when the big lectured followed after a small silence " these chicken chunks are of infected ones...." as if the hen came and discussed her infection issues... "...and they have serious non curable disease..." which i guess a vetinary doc himself would not be aware of "...and can lead to serious health problems...blah blah blah" well i guess only brain would have got infected in worst case as our stomach became strong enough to digest an earthworm or a lizard.

That was end of our chicken soup story and i guess they scared us enough with those sickening infection stories that we never went to the dhaba again in next 365 days...